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Friday, December 30, 2011

The Vomit Zamboni

Pretend you're at Sams.  It's morning and Christmas vacation to top it.   The kids are barely awake, you haven't showered, baby is still in pajamas.  The cart is full and the kids are chomping on bagels not yet paid for.  You're trying to decide between the mega or the super mega pack of salsa.  You hear the nightmarish, unmistakable gurgle before puke sound just in time to turn and see said pajama clad baby projectile vomiting.  You're covered, brand new boots included.  Floor is a mess.  Kids are screaming, now laughing, now screaming.  What in Heaven's name do you do?  Unsuspecting lady passes by and tells you she's been there, offers to watch children while you find someone to clean up vomit.  You, not thinking, leave children in care of stranger and run looking for help.  You suddenly remember children are with stranger, think to self, no one will steal vomiting baby and continue to look for help.  Nice man, noticing you're covered in vomit offers to help.  You get back to children just in time to see a Zamboni looking machine roll up and take care of the floor (wish same machine could take care of you).  Kind man finds you and hands you lots of paper towels.  What now?  Leave cart full of perishables and half eaten bagels or dare to make it through the check out?   We checked out.  It was rough.....for everyone involved...poor, poor young check out girl.  I think I've helped her make the decision to hold off on having kids any time soon.  

1 comment:

Grandma said...

Poor baby. Hope it's only a one day thing. We missed both of you tonite.